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2014-09-04
75.126.230.23
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2025-03-29
173.199.143.140
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HTTP/1.1 200 OKDate: Sat, 29 Mar 2025 03:45:51 GMTServer: ApacheLink: http://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-json/>; relhttps://api.w.org/, http://wp.me/5l4sb>; relshortlinkTransfer-Encoding: chunkedContent-Type: text/html; charsetUTF-8 !DOCTYPE html>!--if IE 6>html idie6 langen-US>!endif-->!--if IE 7>html idie7 langen-US>!endif-->!--if IE 8>html idie8 langen-US>!endif-->!--if !(IE 6) | !(IE 7) | !(IE 8) >!-->html langen-US>!--!endif-->head>meta charsetUTF-8 />meta nameviewport contentwidthdevice-width />title>One Star Watt/title>link relprofile hrefhttp://gmpg.org/xfn/11 />link relstylesheet typetext/css mediaall hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/themes/twentyeleven/style.css />link relpingback hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/xmlrpc.php />!--if lt IE 9>script srchttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/themes/twentyeleven/js/html5.js typetext/javascript>/script>!endif-->!-- All in One SEO Pack 2.3.2.3 by Michael Torbert of Semper Fi Web Design355,446 -->meta namedescription itempropdescription contentA place for Wistar to write whatever she wants for her own private amusement. />meta namekeywords itempropkeywords contentwriter, Brooklyn, New York, writing, author, Brooklyn writer, essays, blog, stories, personal website, Wistar, Wistar Murray />link relnext hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/page/2/ />link relcanonical hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/ />!-- /all in one seo pack -->link reldns-prefetch href//s0.wp.com />link reldns-prefetch href//s.gravatar.com />link reldns-prefetch href//netdna.bootstrapcdn.com />link reldns-prefetch href//s.w.org />link relalternate typeapplication/rss+xml titleOne Star Watt » Feed hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/feed/ />link relalternate typeapplication/rss+xml titleOne Star Watt » Comments Feed hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/comments/feed/ /> script typetext/javascript> window._wpemojiSettings {baseUrl:https:\/\/s.w.org\/images\/core\/emoji\/2.2.1\/72x72\/,ext:.png,svgUrl:https:\/\/s.w.org\/images\/core\/emoji\/2.2.1\/svg\/,svgExt:.svg,source:{concatemoji:http:\/\/www.onestarwatt.com\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-emoji-release.min.js?ver4.7.29}}; 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/script> style typetext/css>img.wp-smiley,img.emoji { display: inline !important; border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; height: 1em !important; width: 1em !important; margin: 0 .07em !important; vertical-align: -0.1em !important; background: none !important; padding: 0 !important;}/style>link relstylesheet idsb_instagram_styles-css hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/plugins/instagram-feed/css/sb-instagram.css?ver1.3.11 typetext/css mediaall />link relstylesheet idsb_instagram_icons-css href//netdna.bootstrapcdn.com/font-awesome/4.2.0/css/font-awesome.min.css?1&ver4.2.0 typetext/css mediaall />link relstylesheet idkamn-css-easy-twitter-feed-widget-css hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/plugins/easy-twitter-feed-widget/easy-twitter-feed-widget.css?ver4.7.29 typetext/css mediaall />link relstylesheet idsimple-social-icons-font-css hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/plugins/simple-social-icons/css/style.css?ver1.0.12 typetext/css mediaall />link relstylesheet idjetpack_css-css hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/plugins/jetpack/css/jetpack.css?ver3.4.4 typetext/css mediaall />link relstylesheet idwp-stats-css hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-stats/stats-css.css?ver2.50 typetext/css mediaall />script typetext/javascript srchttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-includes/js/jquery/jquery.js?ver1.12.4>/script>script typetext/javascript srchttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-includes/js/jquery/jquery-migrate.min.js?ver1.4.1>/script>link relhttps://api.w.org/ hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-json/ />link relEditURI typeapplication/rsd+xml titleRSD hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/xmlrpc.php?rsd />link relwlwmanifest typeapplication/wlwmanifest+xml hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-includes/wlwmanifest.xml /> meta namegenerator contentWordPress 4.7.29 />link relshortlink hrefhttp://wp.me/5l4sb />style typetext/css>img#wpstats{display:none}/style>style typetext/css mediascreen> .simple-social-icons ul li a, .simple-social-icons ul li a:hover { background-color: #999999 !important; border-radius: 3px; color: #ffffff !important; border: 0px #ffffff solid !important; font-size: 18px; padding: 9px; } .simple-social-icons ul li a:hover { background-color: #666666 !important; border-color: #ffffff !important; color: #ffffff !important; }/style>/head>body classhome blog single-author two-column right-sidebar>div idpage classhfeed> header idbranding rolebanner> hgroup> h1 idsite-title>span>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/ titleOne Star Watt relhome>One Star Watt/a>/span>/h1> h2 idsite-description>where Wistar writes whatever she wants for her own private amusement/h2> /hgroup> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/> img srchttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/cropped-dr-gear.jpg width940 height200 alt /> /a> form methodget idsearchform actionhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/> label fors classassistive-text>Search/label> input typetext classfield names ids placeholderSearch /> input typesubmit classsubmit namesubmit idsearchsubmit valueSearch /> /form> nav idaccess rolenavigation> h3 classassistive-text>Main menu/h3> div classskip-link>a classassistive-text href#content titleSkip to primary content>Skip to primary content/a>/div> div classskip-link>a classassistive-text href#secondary titleSkip to secondary content>Skip to secondary content/a>/div> div classmenu>ul>li classcurrent_page_item>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/>Home/a>/li>li classpage_item page-item-2767>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/about/>About/a>/li>/ul>/div> /nav>!-- #access --> /header>!-- #branding --> div idmain> div idprimary> div idcontent rolemain> nav idnav-above> h3 classassistive-text>Post navigation/h3> div classnav-previous>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/page/2/ >span classmeta-nav>←/span> Older posts/a>/div> div classnav-next>/div> /nav>!-- #nav-above --> article idpost-4392 classpost-4392 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/02/02/shooting-my-shot-in-the-congressional-slush-pile/ titlePermalink to Shooting my shot in the congressional slush pile relbookmark>Shooting my shot in the congressional slush pile/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/02/02/shooting-my-shot-in-the-congressional-slush-pile/ title3:27 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2025-02-02T15:27:09+00:00 pubdate>February 2, 2025/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/02/02/shooting-my-shot-in-the-congressional-slush-pile/#comments>1/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>Content of my emails to state and United States reps: “Hello. It’s me, a political wallflower who now identifies strongly as your constituent. Speaking for myself, my friends, my family, and random folks I know who work for the federal government and report literally throwing up in meetings and not sleeping for days and being tormented by decisions like, ‘Should I take the dubious buyout money or follow through on moves and house purchases and try to save the nation from within even though I’ll have no job security, or just drop out of the workforce altogether and raise chickens that will likely die from bird flu?’: Fuck.” /p>p>And also, “Hey what’s the plan? I saw a bunch of protest fliers while doomscrolling Reddit. One of them is sending me to a parking lot next to a local Chinese buffet on Tuesday. Should I go?” /p>p>And also, “My fed contact told me that all FBI field offices have been ordered to prioritize immigrant deportation over preventing domestic terrorism. Is that true?” /p>p>And also, “Deploy me in your resistance. Personally I have nothing to offer you by way of valuable skills or political capital. But please deploy me. Didn’t I send you $25 once?” /p>p>Send messages. Refresh inbox. Refresh inbox. Refresh inbox. Plan follow-up emails, not understanding why my reps don’t immediately take advantage of this direct channel I’ve created after a lifetime of zero interaction. /p>p>If I wanted to be more strategic about it, there are probably levers I could pull, names I could drop in these emails so a staffer would flag them to a higher echelon of inbox. Unknown authors are rarely plucked from the slush pile. They need literary agents to introduce them to publishing houses, so editors know their books are worth reading. (Contributing to my perception that today’s literary world can resemble a multi-level marketing scheme, where uplines only sponsor you if you buy their books, and inevitably there will be more recruiters than readers.) /p>p>I’m sure LLMs are busy sorting political inboxes all over America into positive and negative sentiment, summarizing and categorizing the content of each email. And I’m probably being sorted into the Time-wasting Constituent bucket because my writing never says anything an LLM would find useful, especially when it’s giving sad, scared, and/or desperate./p>p>All I can hope is that one day, years from now, an artificial intelligence will pull a verbatim from one of my emails. And it will wind up on a multi-tabbed spreadsheet used by a political marketing research team. And an actual human eyeball will be scanning the rows and columns, and it will pause briefly on a cell containing my biggest insight from 2025 – “Fuck.” – before moving on to more actionable formulas, functions, and dollar signs./p>p>Katrina E. Callsenbr />DelKCallsen@house.virginia.gov/p>p>Mark L. Warnerbr />https://www.warner.senate.gov/public/index.cfm/contactpage/p>p>Tim Kainebr />https://www.kaine.senate.gov/contact/share-your-opinion/p>p>R. Creigh Deedsbr />senatordeeds@senate.virginia.gov/p>p>John McGuirebr />https://mcguire.house.gov/address_authentication?form/contact/email-me/p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/02/02/shooting-my-shot-in-the-congressional-slush-pile/#comments>b>1/b> Reply/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4392 --> article idpost-4383 classpost-4383 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/15/texting-with-my-daughter-who-just-got-an-apple-watch/ titlePermalink to Texting with my daughter, who just got an Apple Watch relbookmark>Texting with my daughter, who just got an Apple Watch/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/15/texting-with-my-daughter-who-just-got-an-apple-watch/ title10:28 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2025-01-15T22:28:38+00:00 pubdate>January 15, 2025/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/15/texting-with-my-daughter-who-just-got-an-apple-watch/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>strong>Day 1/strong>br />em>11:17am/em>br />Her: Please please please please please please please please call mebr />Her: I need you to help me with jammies pleasebr />Her: Can you please answer me back because I know you’re talking with dadabr />Her: I’m in my creepy zone mama, so text me back and I’ll say over bloody outbr />Her: I do not know what I mean what you mean by my teeth are so dry/p>p>I’ve read about how scientists are using artificial intelligence to decode the language of whales, bees, and other animals. So one day the animals will be talking, and we’ll understand them all perfectly./p>p>em>8:33pm/em>br />Her: I’m stuck on the toilet you can start without mebr />Me: Have you turned into your dad?br />Her: I know it’s fun Ebr />Her: Sorrybr />Her: When I was taking my long cut, I found a piece of candy on the table. Can I have it? It’s a chocolate I mean.br />Me: lol that’s minebr />Her: Call me please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please pleasebr />Her: I brush my hair and teeth. Just please call me.br />Her: I’ll do anything/p>p>Now my 8-year-old daughter has a computer on her wrist, into which she speaks her mind, and the output resembles effective communication. The Apple Watch transcribes her thoughts into correctly spelled words, and often punctuates her sentences. I hear a familiar voice in the texts, but the computer is also teaching her its use cases./p>p>strong>Day 2/strong>br />em>5:41pm/em>br />Her: Hey, it’s almost 6 can we go in soon? she texts from the back seat of the car I’m drivingbr />Her: I can’t feel my buttbr />Her: Still can’t feel my buttbr />Her: More minutes it’s about 553 or 552br />Her: It’s 554 are we there yetbr />Her: Do you see that bag on the railing across from us? she texts while we walk from the car to the restaurantbr />Her: Really want the avocado with stuff inside when you when he comes around, will you order it for me or I can order it? Whatever you want. she texts from the restaurant bathroombr />Her: I believe you/p>p>She becomes a girl with more demands, because the computer is a demanding tool. She’s learned that she can move me bodily from one room to another just by talking into her device./p>p>em>9:59pm/em>br />Her: You have tobr />Her: #£6 e_e’ecayAbr />Her: Christmas treebr />Her: Can I have dessert now will you come down now please please please please please/p>p>I’ve discovered that she’s very comfortable issuing threats from a safe distance./p>p>strong>Day 3/strong>br />em>6:53pm/em>br />Her: Fill it up to the top, and never see a light again/p>p>I cherish the unsolicited “Love you” texts. And when she recently signed off with “I don’t wanna talk about it anymore” after I won an argument, I was mildly amused. But it’s mostly this:/p>p>strong>Day 4/strong>br />em>10:13am/em>br />Her: Could you please come here and help me get dressed?br />Her: I need more help than thatbr />Her: Please please please don’t block me and please please please do more than that getting dressedbr />Her: Please please please thank you thank you Q I’m begging you/p>p>I’m afraid there may come a time when I’ll be floating peaceably in the ocean and a whale will swim right up to me and say in American English, “Please please please please please please please I need you to help me with whale stuff please woman thank you,” and I’ll pretend not to understand./p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/15/texting-with-my-daughter-who-just-got-an-apple-watch/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4383 --> article idpost-4378 classpost-4378 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/12/sick-animals-in-winter/ titlePermalink to Sick animals in winter relbookmark>Sick animals in winter/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/12/sick-animals-in-winter/ title9:49 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2025-01-12T21:49:22+00:00 pubdate>January 12, 2025/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/12/sick-animals-in-winter/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>Man and cat are sick at the same time. It’s either psychic connection or norovirus jumping species. They both puke on the rug. Only one of them has a doctor. The doctor prescribes a liquid diet. A pitbull crosses the doctor’s waiting room on a stretcher. /p>p>Man and cat take similar medicines to feel better. They both suffer from stress. The blizzard had altered routines, concealed hunting grounds. The doctor recommends an aerosol for “enhanced serenity.” Each patient makes room on the bed for the other. They don’t go outside for a while./p>p>Nursing staff is busy. Smooth peanut butter. Cold fresh water. Cuddles. Wet food. Dry food. Bowls to be washed. Bathroom movements to track. Heavy petting. WebMD. /p>p>Man diagnosed cat, which saved cat’s life. Man’s diagnosis remains elusive. Not fair that one patient should recuperate faster than the other. Hot showers help relieve man’s nausea. Tongue laps puddles from the bathtub, wet paws sink into the mat. Man sweats through two blankets and a bedsheet. Cat curls up beside him, smelling of snow./p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/12/sick-animals-in-winter/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4378 --> article idpost-4366 classpost-4366 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/02/double-rainbow/ titlePermalink to Double rainbow relbookmark>Double rainbow/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/02/double-rainbow/ title8:14 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2025-01-02T20:14:14+00:00 pubdate>January 2, 2025/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/02/double-rainbow/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>I hadn’t gone to the cemetery on Christmas Eve, and it was eating me alive. I kept postponing to the next day and the next day. It was raining. No fresh-cut lilies. No great urgency because he was dead. But I kept getting this feeling like he’d been expecting me at that particular time and place. (I always visit on Christmas Eve. It’s been our thing since he died.) So I made this tentative plan in my head to show up on New Year’s Eve./p>p>But that day I worked late and we were due at a family dinner party. Our schedule kept getting tighter and tighter. Plus we’d had a literal thunderstorm with literal lightning. So that meant soggy graves, umbrellas, a wet and whiny daughter, tracking mud through the party, etc. I was about to postpone again when I looked out my office window and saw a double fucking rainbow. I’d known I was late, but I hadn’t realized I was double-rainbow late. I promptly shut down my work computer and got everyone in the car./p>p>The sky was blue now. The rainbows were fading at my back, having done their job with the light. I chose tulips at the store because my mom had told me they keep growing after they’re cut./p>p>At the cemetery, Matt said he’d stay in the car so my daughter and I could “have a moment.” He was enjoying a new tin of snack mix at the time. My sweet girl came with me to the grave, wrapped her arm around my waist for a cuddle, then let go to do the flowers. I heard the car window unroll outside the cemetery wall. “Hug her again!” Matt shouted at our daughter, pointing his phone at us from the idling car. She dutifully hugged me again for the camera./p>p>When I was online later that night, the double rainbow was all over my local feeds, and I realized that I hadn’t thought to take a picture. Matt hadn’t either, even though he’s a photographer and we’d marveled together about how loud the colors were. But at the cemetery he’d insisted on capturing the small arc of our daughter’s arm, and the sun bouncing off our hair, as if to prove that we’d gotten the memo from above. Now I’ll always have an image of that feeling that we’re still living parallel to the dead, that the dead still know how to summon us to their sides, even though it may just be a trick of the light./p>p>img classaligncenter wp-image-4367 size-full srchttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_4139.jpeg alt width3024 height4032 srcsethttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_4139.jpeg 3024w, http://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_4139-225x300.jpeg 225w, http://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_4139-768x1024.jpeg 768w sizes(max-width: 3024px) 100vw, 3024px />/p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/02/double-rainbow/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4366 --> article idpost-4360 classpost-4360 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/28/festive-attire/ titlePermalink to Festive attire relbookmark>Festive attire/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/28/festive-attire/ title2:14 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2024-12-28T14:14:59+00:00 pubdate>December 28, 2024/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/28/festive-attire/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>span stylefont-weight: 400;>On Christmas night, I kept finding more caramel down the front of my shirt. Surprised me every time. I’d only had four fistfuls of cake. I thought they’d all made it into my mouth. And yet when I slipped off my turtleneck dickie worn in tribute to Cousin Eddie, I found a chunk of caramel frosting mashed into the bib. I thought that was the end of it, then more frosting turned up inside my shirt when I put on pajamas. And it wasn’t until the next day that I found my bra encrusted with caramel as if I’d been stuffing cake down my cleavage all night. What kind of party was this? I blame my sister. /span>/p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/28/festive-attire/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4360 --> article idpost-4350 classpost-4350 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/22/bed-of-nails/ titlePermalink to Bed of nails relbookmark>Bed of nails/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/22/bed-of-nails/ title4:14 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2024-12-22T16:14:31+00:00 pubdate>December 22, 2024/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/22/bed-of-nails/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>We’d both seen the ad for the bed of nails. “Another thing to try to relax you,” I said, thinking of the probiotics and the massage guns and the neurofeedback device that sits like a crown on his head. Where does it all end? I looked at my beautiful, high-strung boy, who’s equally triggered by love and traffic. “Sold,” I told him. “I’m just going to relax you until you’re dead.”/p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/22/bed-of-nails/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4350 --> article idpost-4351 classpost-4351 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-less-bullshit> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/21/drone-sighting/ titlePermalink to Drone sighting relbookmark>Drone sighting/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/21/drone-sighting/ title8:57 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2024-12-21T20:57:04+00:00 pubdate>December 21, 2024/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/21/drone-sighting/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>I saw a drone over my mother’s house, and I say that despite knowing how silly it sounds. If you’re leaving your mother’s house on a dark winter night after eating some tortellini, and you cross paths with a low-flying drone flashing green on one side, and it’s 10 times bigger than the one you gave your nephew so you have to rule him out even though he lives across the creek, what do you do? I stopped the car and told Bean to look. (Every time I ask her, she confirms the sighting. “Bean, what did you see in the sky that night when we had dinner at Yaya’s?” “A drone.” But I must have told her it was a drone at the time, plus I’ve already brainwashed her in a thousand different cultish ways, so let’s call her an unreliable witness, which makes a total of two in this story.)span classApple-converted-space> /span>/p>p>I didn’t mention the drone sighting to anyone until the next day, because I had feelings about it. Guilt because I’d continued to drive home after seeing a strange, malevolently-lit object drifting toward my mother’s house. And sheepishness because I don’t usually identify as someone who jumps on a bandwagon with people from New Jersey. Seeing a viral drone is so off-brand for me that I’ve turned up here to think it through. How do I wrestle this UFO back to the ground? Why am I so reluctant to be part of a mystery? When I told Matt, he said to call the cops. A week later, consider this my report.span classApple-converted-space> /span>/p>p>Mysteries don’t appeal to me. I rarely light candles or go outside at night. If there were aliens puttering around in the sky, I’d hope they’d seek out someone more interesting. But all the U.S. sightings make me feel like I have to share mine. I’m not part of a scene that thinks weird, cool stuff can happen. I’m not high above it either. Maybe I just have somewhere to get to, like in that poem where the flying boy crashes to earth and no one cares, particularly. I have bills, maps, laundry. It’s a luxury to maintain an atmosphere of personal magic. I try to outsource it to my kid as much as possible./p>p>This is a disappointing way to respond to a drone. The objects won’t come for me again.span classApple-converted-space> /span>/p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/category/less-bullshit/ relcategory tag>less bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/21/drone-sighting/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4351 --> article idpost-4282 classpost-4282 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/05/03/a-tall-stack-of-pandemic-page-turners-repurposed-as-beach-reads/ titlePermalink to A tall stack of pandemic page-turners repurposed as beach reads relbookmark>A tall stack of pandemic page-turners repurposed as beach reads/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/05/03/a-tall-stack-of-pandemic-page-turners-repurposed-as-beach-reads/ title7:11 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2021-05-03T19:11:16+00:00 pubdate>May 3, 2021/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/05/03/a-tall-stack-of-pandemic-page-turners-repurposed-as-beach-reads/#comments>1/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>I’ve decided to write some useful content for once. But then I’ll conclude my post with personal observations that are both foolish and pointless because that is my brand./p>p>So here are some of the best mysteries and thrillers that helped me endure the pandemic, i.e., turn my brain off for hours at a time. I recommend taking these books to your private islands and secluded beaches this summer. There you can devour them along with the body parts of all the people you’ve dramatically murdered./p>h1>The Stack/h1>p>em>1. Final Girls/em>, em>Home Before Dark/em>, em>The Last Time I Lied/em>, and em>Lock Every Door/em> by a hrefhttps://www.rileysagerbooks.com>Riley Sager/a>. These novels are twisty, terrifying (especially em>Home Before Dark/em>), and driven by strong female voices. Still can’t believe Sager is a man./p>p>em>2. When No One Is Watching/em> by a hrefhttps://alyssacole.com>Alyssa Cole/a>. This book a hrefhttps://crimereads.com/congratulations-to-the-winners-of-the-2021-edgar-awards/>just won a well-deserved Edgar Award/a>. The story is darkly real and riveting and as a bonus Cole handles the sexy stuff like the romance ninja she is./p>p>em>3. The Survivors/em> by a hrefhttps://janeharper.com.au>Jane Harper/a>. em>The Dry/em> is still my favorite by Harper, but this one made me start planning a vacation to Tasmania, which is saying something./p>p>em>4. The Tenant/em> and em>The Butterfly House/em> by a hrefhttps://www.simonandschuster.com/authors/Katrine-Engberg/158550112>Katrine Engberg/a>. The murders are just okay but I’m down with the detectives and the writing./p>p>5. The Inspector Lynley series by a hrefhttp://www.elizabethgeorgeonline.com>Elizabeth George/a>. SO GOOD. Read them a hrefhttps://www.orderofbooks.com/characters/inspector-lynley/>in order/a>. George will repeatedly break your heart, but the journey is worth it./p>p>6. All of the Fjallbacka books by a hrefhttp://www.camillalackberg.com>Camilla Lackberg/a>. Lackberg is an OG with a uniquely deviant imagination./p>p>em>7. The Last House Guest/em> by a hrefhttps://meganmiranda.com>Megan Miranda/a>. Rich people, coastal vacation homes, unsolved homicides. Kind of predictable, but you read on./p>p>em>8. a hrefhttps://www.theguardian.com/books/2020/oct/02/the-devil-and-dark-water-by-stuart-turton-review>The Devil and the Dark Water/a>/em> by Stuart Turton. Needlessly complex at times, but super interesting if you like wooden ships and the supernatural. Couldn’t get through Turton’s other elaborate mystery, em>The 7.5 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle/em>, because I’m too basic./p>p>9. Theo Cray and Jessica Blackwood and Underwater Investigation novels by a hrefhttps://andrewmayne.com>Andrew Mayne/a>. I think Mayne was the first author I binged via Kindle Unlimited. Mayne is an honest-to-god magician who dives with sharks and writes all these books about serial killers just so he can give every antihero a happy ending./p>p>10. The Dublin Trilogy (actually four novels) by a hrefhttps://whitehairedirishman.com>Caimh McDonnell/a>. These “darkly comic crime thrillers” are just fun. Sharp writing and lovable, over-the-top characters./p>p>em>11. The Silent Patient/em> by a hrefhttps://celadonbooks.com/novel-inspiration-alex-michaelides-author-of-the-silent-patient-on-writing-the-perfect-thriller/>Alex Michaelides/a>/p>p>em>12. The Trap/em> by a hrefhttps://www.fantasticfiction.com/r/melanie-raabe/>Melanie Raabe/a>/p>p>em>13. The Magpies/em> by a hrefhttps://www.markedwardsauthor.com/books/the-magpies/>Mark Edwards/a>/p>p>em>14. a hrefhttps://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250268822>Every Last Fear/a>/em> by Alex Finlay/p>p>em>15. a hrefhttps://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250117441>Proving Ground/a>/em> by Peter Blauner/p>p>em>16. a hrefhttps://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/603508/the-red-lotus-by-chris-bohjalian/>The Red Lotus/a>/em> by Peter Bohjalian/p>p>em>17. a hrefhttps://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/211944/the-boy-in-the-suitcase-by-lene-kaaberbol-agnete-friis/>The Boy in the Suitcase/a>/em> by Lene Kaaberbol and Agnete Friis/p>p>I’ve also read a lot of mysteries that were meh. I could put them in a listicle as well, but I’m trying to offer quality content today./p>h4>Meh Things I’ve Read and Said During the Pandemic/h4>p>is a headline that would be followed by a billion boring things. Like for instance I’m between mystery books right now so I just read an entire bathing suit catalog marketed to women who have birthed children. In the catalog photos the sea breeze catches the hems of the models’ tie-dyed sarongs and maxi dresses and their bikini tops peek out flirtatiously from under their ombre macrame crossbody blouses and their strappy sandals sink into the wet sand and the ocean sparkles behind them and I’m just flipping the pages thinking, “It’s only a matter of time before your naked bodies are found creatively arranged in dumpsters and only a psychologically damaged FBI profiler with a secret past can figure out why.”/p>p> /p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/05/03/a-tall-stack-of-pandemic-page-turners-repurposed-as-beach-reads/#comments>b>1/b> Reply/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4282 --> article idpost-4263 classpost-4263 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/28/it-shouldnt-be-this-hard-to-get-people-to-pay-me-money-so-i-can-buy-stuff/ titlePermalink to It shouldn’t be this hard to get people to pay me money so I can buy stuff relbookmark>It shouldn’t be this hard to get people to pay me money so I can buy stuff/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/28/it-shouldnt-be-this-hard-to-get-people-to-pay-me-money-so-i-can-buy-stuff/ title10:57 am relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2021-04-28T10:57:52+00:00 pubdate>April 28, 2021/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/28/it-shouldnt-be-this-hard-to-get-people-to-pay-me-money-so-i-can-buy-stuff/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>When my daughter finally returned to preschool last week, her teacher asked her to tell the class about her family. She said, “My dada works at a a hrefhttps://www.knifecenter.com>knife company/a> and my mom likes to shop.” Thank you, Pandemic Year, for blessing me with the opportunity to show my impressionable young daughter all that a woman is capable of being./p>p>I do, in fact, buy a lot of stuff. It’s mostly food and medicine, with some frequency. I don’t collect records. I don’t care for expensive electronics. Coffee is good, bought in bulk when on sale. If I get a fungus on one of my more prominent toes, I will splurge on some generic ointment from CVS. And that’s about it except for my Goodwill habit, which sees me buying used clothes and storybooks every other week for my daughter. But I didn’t set foot in a Goodwill until I was vaccinated. Then I went nuts, spending $5 on one visit, $3 on another, always rounding up to help “fund job training” even though we all have our suspicions. Our house contains a lot of old plastic toys with the price stickers still on them, which will save Goodwill employees time when I disappear the toys back to the donation center while my daughter is at preschool./p>p>Right now I’m shopping for a job. I’ve had a few interviews and they all go the same way. 1) I put on lipstick. 2) I babble into my computer for 30 minutes with the expectation that the hiring manager or VP or whoever will find me so charming and human and real that they’ll hire me on the spot. 3) I don’t get hired. 4) I remember that I am now 40, devoid of youthful charm, and I didn’t go to personal branding college, and being a human is not actually a qualification. It’s like, the lowest bar. Lower than a machine. Lower than a fungus. But you also risk “underselling” yourself if you begin an interview confessing that you are lower than a fungus./p>p>And yet you only have to get hired em>one/em> time, by em>one/em> company, and then you’re suddenly Employable and Professional again and people like your 4-year-old daughter can respect you. I imagine it’s a transformative experience. Probably really good for one’s self-esteem./p>p>Interview Tips/p>ol>li>Don’t say the first thing that pops into your head. You are not blogging./li>li>Don’t lead with your greatest weakness, like that you have a Goodwill shopping addiction, or that you’re a loser./li>li>You can try to be funny for precisely 28 seconds, then you need to talk about your marketing experience./li>li>Stop taking nervous sips of iced coffee from your Yeti thermos because they’ll assume there’s vodka in it and come to think of it you’re acting drunk./li>li>Don’t cling to your daughter when you pick her up from school as if your entire identity depends on her./li>li>Don’t lose career momentum during a once-in-a-century pandemic./li>/ol> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/28/it-shouldnt-be-this-hard-to-get-people-to-pay-me-money-so-i-can-buy-stuff/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4263 --> article idpost-4258 classpost-4258 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/23/meming-the-neighbors/ titlePermalink to Meming the neighbors relbookmark>Meming the neighbors/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/23/meming-the-neighbors/ title11:51 am relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2021-04-23T11:51:49+00:00 pubdate>April 23, 2021/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/23/meming-the-neighbors/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>Our new neighborhood has a micro-kinder-culture that celebrates decorative crocs, hoverboards, and worms. Small posses of children migrate from house to house, rolling as if weightless on their electric craft, stomping across lawns in their spangled rubber shoes, overturning every brick and paving stone in their neighbors’ backyards, yelling “Jackpot!” when they find a particularly long and/or swollen earthworm, then triumphantly absconding with the squirming creatures in their soiled hands./p>p>Where do the children go when they leave us? I couldn’t say. I have not been to their homes. I have not stolen worms from their yards. It’s just not a thing where I’m from. As a progressive woman of middle age, I try to tolerate the foreign neighborhood kinder-culture, but I also find myself feeling threatened in the midst of this constant earthworm transport. Especially because we are still fighting a pandemic that was probably started at a wet market. I don’t know what these kids are doing with these live worms, if they’re selling them to restaurants or what, but I feel that it’s only a matter of time before a disease jumps from worm to kid, or god forbid from kid to worm. Then what?/p>p>That is a rhetorical question. We all know what will happen. Little worm hospitals. Tanks of oxygen the length of their slimy, unfurled bodies./p>p>By the way, my mom told me recently that when she was little she ate a roly-poly on a dare and she is like a different person to me now./p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/23/meming-the-neighbors/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4258 --> nav idnav-below> h3 classassistive-text>Post navigation/h3> div classnav-previous>a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/page/2/ >span classmeta-nav>←/span> Older posts/a>/div> div classnav-next>/div> /nav>!-- #nav-above --> /div>!-- #content --> /div>!-- #primary --> div idsecondary classwidget-area rolecomplementary> aside idsearch-2 classwidget widget_search> form methodget idsearchform actionhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/> label fors classassistive-text>Search/label> input typetext classfield names ids placeholderSearch /> input typesubmit classsubmit namesubmit idsearchsubmit valueSearch /> /form>/aside> aside idrecent-posts-3 classwidget widget_recent_entries> h3 classwidget-title>Recent Posts/h3> ul> li> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/02/02/shooting-my-shot-in-the-congressional-slush-pile/>Shooting my shot in the congressional slush pile/a> /li> li> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/15/texting-with-my-daughter-who-just-got-an-apple-watch/>Texting with my daughter, who just got an Apple Watch/a> /li> li> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/12/sick-animals-in-winter/>Sick animals in winter/a> /li> li> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/02/double-rainbow/>Double rainbow/a> /li> li> a hrefhttp://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/28/festive-attire/>Festive attire/a> /li> /ul> /aside> aside idsimple-social-icons-2 classwidget simple-social-icons>ul classalignleft>li classsocial-facebook>a hrefhttps://www.facebook.com/wistar.murray >/a>/li>li classsocial-instagram>a hrefhttps://instagram.com/onestarwatt/ >/a>/li>li classsocial-linkedin>a hrefhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/wistar-murray-2b66a84/ >/a>/li>li classsocial-twitter>a hrefhttps://twitter.com/onestarwatt >/a>/li>/ul>/aside> /div>!-- #secondary .widget-area --> /div>!-- #main --> footer idcolophon rolecontentinfo> div idsite-generator> a hrefhttp://wordpress.org/ titleSemantic Personal Publishing Platform relgenerator>Proudly powered by WordPress/a> /div> /footer>!-- #colophon -->/div>!-- #page --> div styledisplay:none> /div>script typetext/javascript>/* !CDATA */var sb_instagram_js_options {sb_instagram_at:304530049.97584da.8826a98b8cca420f8717a9546bf3452a};/* > *//script>script typetext/javascript srchttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/plugins/instagram-feed/js/sb-instagram.js?ver1.3.11>/script>script typetext/javascript srchttp://s0.wp.com/wp-content/js/devicepx-jetpack.js?ver202513>/script>script typetext/javascript srchttp://s.gravatar.com/js/gprofiles.js?ver2025Maraa>/script>script typetext/javascript>/* !CDATA */var WPGroHo {my_hash:};/* > *//script>script typetext/javascript srchttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/plugins/jetpack/modules/wpgroho.js?ver4.7.29>/script>script typetext/javascript srchttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/plugins/easy-twitter-feed-widget/lib/js/widget-easy-twitter-feed-widget.js?ver1.0>/script>script typetext/javascript srchttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-includes/js/wp-embed.min.js?ver4.7.29>/script>script typetext/javascript srchttp://stats.wp.com/e-202513.js async defer>/script>script typetext/javascript> _stq window._stq || ; _stq.push( view, {v:ext,j:1:3.4.4,blog:78903691,post:0,tz:-5} ); _stq.push( clickTrackerInit, 78903691, 0 );/script>/body>/html>
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border-radius: 3px; color: #ffffff !important; border: 0px #ffffff solid !important; font-size: 18px; padding: 9px; } .simple-social-icons ul li a:hover { background-color: #666666 !important; border-color: #ffffff !important; color: #ffffff !important; }/style>/head>body classhome blog single-author two-column right-sidebar>div idpage classhfeed> header idbranding rolebanner> hgroup> h1 idsite-title>span>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/ titleOne Star Watt relhome>One Star Watt/a>/span>/h1> h2 idsite-description>where Wistar writes whatever she wants for her own private amusement/h2> /hgroup> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/> img srchttps://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/cropped-dr-gear.jpg width940 height200 alt /> /a> form methodget idsearchform actionhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/> label fors classassistive-text>Search/label> input typetext classfield names ids placeholderSearch /> input typesubmit classsubmit namesubmit idsearchsubmit valueSearch /> /form> nav idaccess rolenavigation> h3 classassistive-text>Main menu/h3> div classskip-link>a classassistive-text href#content titleSkip to primary content>Skip to primary content/a>/div> div classskip-link>a classassistive-text href#secondary titleSkip to secondary content>Skip to secondary content/a>/div> div classmenu>ul>li classcurrent_page_item>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/>Home/a>/li>li classpage_item page-item-2767>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/about/>About/a>/li>/ul>/div> /nav>!-- #access --> /header>!-- #branding --> div idmain> div idprimary> div idcontent rolemain> nav idnav-above> h3 classassistive-text>Post navigation/h3> div classnav-previous>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/page/2/ >span classmeta-nav>←/span> Older posts/a>/div> div classnav-next>/div> /nav>!-- #nav-above --> article idpost-4392 classpost-4392 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/02/02/shooting-my-shot-in-the-congressional-slush-pile/ titlePermalink to Shooting my shot in the congressional slush pile relbookmark>Shooting my shot in the congressional slush pile/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/02/02/shooting-my-shot-in-the-congressional-slush-pile/ title3:27 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2025-02-02T15:27:09+00:00 pubdate>February 2, 2025/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/02/02/shooting-my-shot-in-the-congressional-slush-pile/#comments>1/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>Content of my emails to state and United States reps: “Hello. It’s me, a political wallflower who now identifies strongly as your constituent. Speaking for myself, my friends, my family, and random folks I know who work for the federal government and report literally throwing up in meetings and not sleeping for days and being tormented by decisions like, ‘Should I take the dubious buyout money or follow through on moves and house purchases and try to save the nation from within even though I’ll have no job security, or just drop out of the workforce altogether and raise chickens that will likely die from bird flu?’: Fuck.” /p>p>And also, “Hey what’s the plan? I saw a bunch of protest fliers while doomscrolling Reddit. One of them is sending me to a parking lot next to a local Chinese buffet on Tuesday. Should I go?” /p>p>And also, “My fed contact told me that all FBI field offices have been ordered to prioritize immigrant deportation over preventing domestic terrorism. Is that true?” /p>p>And also, “Deploy me in your resistance. Personally I have nothing to offer you by way of valuable skills or political capital. But please deploy me. Didn’t I send you $25 once?” /p>p>Send messages. Refresh inbox. Refresh inbox. Refresh inbox. Plan follow-up emails, not understanding why my reps don’t immediately take advantage of this direct channel I’ve created after a lifetime of zero interaction. /p>p>If I wanted to be more strategic about it, there are probably levers I could pull, names I could drop in these emails so a staffer would flag them to a higher echelon of inbox. Unknown authors are rarely plucked from the slush pile. They need literary agents to introduce them to publishing houses, so editors know their books are worth reading. (Contributing to my perception that today’s literary world can resemble a multi-level marketing scheme, where uplines only sponsor you if you buy their books, and inevitably there will be more recruiters than readers.) /p>p>I’m sure LLMs are busy sorting political inboxes all over America into positive and negative sentiment, summarizing and categorizing the content of each email. And I’m probably being sorted into the Time-wasting Constituent bucket because my writing never says anything an LLM would find useful, especially when it’s giving sad, scared, and/or desperate./p>p>All I can hope is that one day, years from now, an artificial intelligence will pull a verbatim from one of my emails. And it will wind up on a multi-tabbed spreadsheet used by a political marketing research team. And an actual human eyeball will be scanning the rows and columns, and it will pause briefly on a cell containing my biggest insight from 2025 – “Fuck.” – before moving on to more actionable formulas, functions, and dollar signs./p>p>Katrina E. Callsenbr />DelKCallsen@house.virginia.gov/p>p>Mark L. Warnerbr />https://www.warner.senate.gov/public/index.cfm/contactpage/p>p>Tim Kainebr />https://www.kaine.senate.gov/contact/share-your-opinion/p>p>R. Creigh Deedsbr />senatordeeds@senate.virginia.gov/p>p>John McGuirebr />https://mcguire.house.gov/address_authentication?form/contact/email-me/p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/02/02/shooting-my-shot-in-the-congressional-slush-pile/#comments>b>1/b> Reply/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4392 --> article idpost-4383 classpost-4383 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/15/texting-with-my-daughter-who-just-got-an-apple-watch/ titlePermalink to Texting with my daughter, who just got an Apple Watch relbookmark>Texting with my daughter, who just got an Apple Watch/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/15/texting-with-my-daughter-who-just-got-an-apple-watch/ title10:28 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2025-01-15T22:28:38+00:00 pubdate>January 15, 2025/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/15/texting-with-my-daughter-who-just-got-an-apple-watch/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>strong>Day 1/strong>br />em>11:17am/em>br />Her: Please please please please please please please please call mebr />Her: I need you to help me with jammies pleasebr />Her: Can you please answer me back because I know you’re talking with dadabr />Her: I’m in my creepy zone mama, so text me back and I’ll say over bloody outbr />Her: I do not know what I mean what you mean by my teeth are so dry/p>p>I’ve read about how scientists are using artificial intelligence to decode the language of whales, bees, and other animals. So one day the animals will be talking, and we’ll understand them all perfectly./p>p>em>8:33pm/em>br />Her: I’m stuck on the toilet you can start without mebr />Me: Have you turned into your dad?br />Her: I know it’s fun Ebr />Her: Sorrybr />Her: When I was taking my long cut, I found a piece of candy on the table. Can I have it? It’s a chocolate I mean.br />Me: lol that’s minebr />Her: Call me please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please pleasebr />Her: I brush my hair and teeth. Just please call me.br />Her: I’ll do anything/p>p>Now my 8-year-old daughter has a computer on her wrist, into which she speaks her mind, and the output resembles effective communication. The Apple Watch transcribes her thoughts into correctly spelled words, and often punctuates her sentences. I hear a familiar voice in the texts, but the computer is also teaching her its use cases./p>p>strong>Day 2/strong>br />em>5:41pm/em>br />Her: Hey, it’s almost 6 can we go in soon? she texts from the back seat of the car I’m drivingbr />Her: I can’t feel my buttbr />Her: Still can’t feel my buttbr />Her: More minutes it’s about 553 or 552br />Her: It’s 554 are we there yetbr />Her: Do you see that bag on the railing across from us? she texts while we walk from the car to the restaurantbr />Her: Really want the avocado with stuff inside when you when he comes around, will you order it for me or I can order it? Whatever you want. she texts from the restaurant bathroombr />Her: I believe you/p>p>She becomes a girl with more demands, because the computer is a demanding tool. She’s learned that she can move me bodily from one room to another just by talking into her device./p>p>em>9:59pm/em>br />Her: You have tobr />Her: #£6 e_e’ecayAbr />Her: Christmas treebr />Her: Can I have dessert now will you come down now please please please please please/p>p>I’ve discovered that she’s very comfortable issuing threats from a safe distance./p>p>strong>Day 3/strong>br />em>6:53pm/em>br />Her: Fill it up to the top, and never see a light again/p>p>I cherish the unsolicited “Love you” texts. And when she recently signed off with “I don’t wanna talk about it anymore” after I won an argument, I was mildly amused. But it’s mostly this:/p>p>strong>Day 4/strong>br />em>10:13am/em>br />Her: Could you please come here and help me get dressed?br />Her: I need more help than thatbr />Her: Please please please don’t block me and please please please do more than that getting dressedbr />Her: Please please please thank you thank you Q I’m begging you/p>p>I’m afraid there may come a time when I’ll be floating peaceably in the ocean and a whale will swim right up to me and say in American English, “Please please please please please please please I need you to help me with whale stuff please woman thank you,” and I’ll pretend not to understand./p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/15/texting-with-my-daughter-who-just-got-an-apple-watch/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4383 --> article idpost-4378 classpost-4378 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/12/sick-animals-in-winter/ titlePermalink to Sick animals in winter relbookmark>Sick animals in winter/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/12/sick-animals-in-winter/ title9:49 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2025-01-12T21:49:22+00:00 pubdate>January 12, 2025/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/12/sick-animals-in-winter/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>Man and cat are sick at the same time. It’s either psychic connection or norovirus jumping species. They both puke on the rug. Only one of them has a doctor. The doctor prescribes a liquid diet. A pitbull crosses the doctor’s waiting room on a stretcher. /p>p>Man and cat take similar medicines to feel better. They both suffer from stress. The blizzard had altered routines, concealed hunting grounds. The doctor recommends an aerosol for “enhanced serenity.” Each patient makes room on the bed for the other. They don’t go outside for a while./p>p>Nursing staff is busy. Smooth peanut butter. Cold fresh water. Cuddles. Wet food. Dry food. Bowls to be washed. Bathroom movements to track. Heavy petting. WebMD. /p>p>Man diagnosed cat, which saved cat’s life. Man’s diagnosis remains elusive. Not fair that one patient should recuperate faster than the other. Hot showers help relieve man’s nausea. Tongue laps puddles from the bathtub, wet paws sink into the mat. Man sweats through two blankets and a bedsheet. Cat curls up beside him, smelling of snow./p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/12/sick-animals-in-winter/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4378 --> article idpost-4366 classpost-4366 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/02/double-rainbow/ titlePermalink to Double rainbow relbookmark>Double rainbow/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/02/double-rainbow/ title8:14 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2025-01-02T20:14:14+00:00 pubdate>January 2, 2025/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/02/double-rainbow/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>I hadn’t gone to the cemetery on Christmas Eve, and it was eating me alive. I kept postponing to the next day and the next day. It was raining. No fresh-cut lilies. No great urgency because he was dead. But I kept getting this feeling like he’d been expecting me at that particular time and place. (I always visit on Christmas Eve. It’s been our thing since he died.) So I made this tentative plan in my head to show up on New Year’s Eve./p>p>But that day I worked late and we were due at a family dinner party. Our schedule kept getting tighter and tighter. Plus we’d had a literal thunderstorm with literal lightning. So that meant soggy graves, umbrellas, a wet and whiny daughter, tracking mud through the party, etc. I was about to postpone again when I looked out my office window and saw a double fucking rainbow. I’d known I was late, but I hadn’t realized I was double-rainbow late. I promptly shut down my work computer and got everyone in the car./p>p>The sky was blue now. The rainbows were fading at my back, having done their job with the light. I chose tulips at the store because my mom had told me they keep growing after they’re cut./p>p>At the cemetery, Matt said he’d stay in the car so my daughter and I could “have a moment.” He was enjoying a new tin of snack mix at the time. My sweet girl came with me to the grave, wrapped her arm around my waist for a cuddle, then let go to do the flowers. I heard the car window unroll outside the cemetery wall. “Hug her again!” Matt shouted at our daughter, pointing his phone at us from the idling car. She dutifully hugged me again for the camera./p>p>When I was online later that night, the double rainbow was all over my local feeds, and I realized that I hadn’t thought to take a picture. Matt hadn’t either, even though he’s a photographer and we’d marveled together about how loud the colors were. But at the cemetery he’d insisted on capturing the small arc of our daughter’s arm, and the sun bouncing off our hair, as if to prove that we’d gotten the memo from above. Now I’ll always have an image of that feeling that we’re still living parallel to the dead, that the dead still know how to summon us to their sides, even though it may just be a trick of the light./p>p>img classaligncenter wp-image-4367 size-full srchttp://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_4139.jpeg alt width3024 height4032 srcsethttps://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_4139.jpeg 3024w, https://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_4139-225x300.jpeg 225w, https://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/IMG_4139-768x1024.jpeg 768w sizes(max-width: 3024px) 100vw, 3024px />/p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/02/double-rainbow/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4366 --> article idpost-4360 classpost-4360 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/28/festive-attire/ titlePermalink to Festive attire relbookmark>Festive attire/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/28/festive-attire/ title2:14 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2024-12-28T14:14:59+00:00 pubdate>December 28, 2024/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/28/festive-attire/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>span stylefont-weight: 400;>On Christmas night, I kept finding more caramel down the front of my shirt. Surprised me every time. I’d only had four fistfuls of cake. I thought they’d all made it into my mouth. And yet when I slipped off my turtleneck dickie worn in tribute to Cousin Eddie, I found a chunk of caramel frosting mashed into the bib. I thought that was the end of it, then more frosting turned up inside my shirt when I put on pajamas. And it wasn’t until the next day that I found my bra encrusted with caramel as if I’d been stuffing cake down my cleavage all night. What kind of party was this? I blame my sister. /span>/p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/28/festive-attire/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4360 --> article idpost-4350 classpost-4350 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/22/bed-of-nails/ titlePermalink to Bed of nails relbookmark>Bed of nails/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/22/bed-of-nails/ title4:14 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2024-12-22T16:14:31+00:00 pubdate>December 22, 2024/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/22/bed-of-nails/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>We’d both seen the ad for the bed of nails. “Another thing to try to relax you,” I said, thinking of the probiotics and the massage guns and the neurofeedback device that sits like a crown on his head. Where does it all end? I looked at my beautiful, high-strung boy, who’s equally triggered by love and traffic. “Sold,” I told him. “I’m just going to relax you until you’re dead.”/p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/22/bed-of-nails/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4350 --> article idpost-4351 classpost-4351 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-less-bullshit> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/21/drone-sighting/ titlePermalink to Drone sighting relbookmark>Drone sighting/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/21/drone-sighting/ title8:57 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2024-12-21T20:57:04+00:00 pubdate>December 21, 2024/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/21/drone-sighting/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>I saw a drone over my mother’s house, and I say that despite knowing how silly it sounds. If you’re leaving your mother’s house on a dark winter night after eating some tortellini, and you cross paths with a low-flying drone flashing green on one side, and it’s 10 times bigger than the one you gave your nephew so you have to rule him out even though he lives across the creek, what do you do? I stopped the car and told Bean to look. (Every time I ask her, she confirms the sighting. “Bean, what did you see in the sky that night when we had dinner at Yaya’s?” “A drone.” But I must have told her it was a drone at the time, plus I’ve already brainwashed her in a thousand different cultish ways, so let’s call her an unreliable witness, which makes a total of two in this story.)span classApple-converted-space> /span>/p>p>I didn’t mention the drone sighting to anyone until the next day, because I had feelings about it. Guilt because I’d continued to drive home after seeing a strange, malevolently-lit object drifting toward my mother’s house. And sheepishness because I don’t usually identify as someone who jumps on a bandwagon with people from New Jersey. Seeing a viral drone is so off-brand for me that I’ve turned up here to think it through. How do I wrestle this UFO back to the ground? Why am I so reluctant to be part of a mystery? When I told Matt, he said to call the cops. A week later, consider this my report.span classApple-converted-space> /span>/p>p>Mysteries don’t appeal to me. I rarely light candles or go outside at night. If there were aliens puttering around in the sky, I’d hope they’d seek out someone more interesting. But all the U.S. sightings make me feel like I have to share mine. I’m not part of a scene that thinks weird, cool stuff can happen. I’m not high above it either. Maybe I just have somewhere to get to, like in that poem where the flying boy crashes to earth and no one cares, particularly. I have bills, maps, laundry. It’s a luxury to maintain an atmosphere of personal magic. I try to outsource it to my kid as much as possible./p>p>This is a disappointing way to respond to a drone. The objects won’t come for me again.span classApple-converted-space> /span>/p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/category/less-bullshit/ relcategory tag>less bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/21/drone-sighting/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4351 --> article idpost-4282 classpost-4282 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/05/03/a-tall-stack-of-pandemic-page-turners-repurposed-as-beach-reads/ titlePermalink to A tall stack of pandemic page-turners repurposed as beach reads relbookmark>A tall stack of pandemic page-turners repurposed as beach reads/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/05/03/a-tall-stack-of-pandemic-page-turners-repurposed-as-beach-reads/ title7:11 pm relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2021-05-03T19:11:16+00:00 pubdate>May 3, 2021/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/05/03/a-tall-stack-of-pandemic-page-turners-repurposed-as-beach-reads/#comments>1/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>I’ve decided to write some useful content for once. But then I’ll conclude my post with personal observations that are both foolish and pointless because that is my brand./p>p>So here are some of the best mysteries and thrillers that helped me endure the pandemic, i.e., turn my brain off for hours at a time. I recommend taking these books to your private islands and secluded beaches this summer. There you can devour them along with the body parts of all the people you’ve dramatically murdered./p>h1>The Stack/h1>p>em>1. Final Girls/em>, em>Home Before Dark/em>, em>The Last Time I Lied/em>, and em>Lock Every Door/em> by a hrefhttps://www.rileysagerbooks.com>Riley Sager/a>. These novels are twisty, terrifying (especially em>Home Before Dark/em>), and driven by strong female voices. Still can’t believe Sager is a man./p>p>em>2. When No One Is Watching/em> by a hrefhttps://alyssacole.com>Alyssa Cole/a>. This book a hrefhttps://crimereads.com/congratulations-to-the-winners-of-the-2021-edgar-awards/>just won a well-deserved Edgar Award/a>. The story is darkly real and riveting and as a bonus Cole handles the sexy stuff like the romance ninja she is./p>p>em>3. The Survivors/em> by a hrefhttps://janeharper.com.au>Jane Harper/a>. em>The Dry/em> is still my favorite by Harper, but this one made me start planning a vacation to Tasmania, which is saying something./p>p>em>4. The Tenant/em> and em>The Butterfly House/em> by a hrefhttps://www.simonandschuster.com/authors/Katrine-Engberg/158550112>Katrine Engberg/a>. The murders are just okay but I’m down with the detectives and the writing./p>p>5. The Inspector Lynley series by a hrefhttp://www.elizabethgeorgeonline.com>Elizabeth George/a>. SO GOOD. Read them a hrefhttps://www.orderofbooks.com/characters/inspector-lynley/>in order/a>. George will repeatedly break your heart, but the journey is worth it./p>p>6. All of the Fjallbacka books by a hrefhttp://www.camillalackberg.com>Camilla Lackberg/a>. Lackberg is an OG with a uniquely deviant imagination./p>p>em>7. The Last House Guest/em> by a hrefhttps://meganmiranda.com>Megan Miranda/a>. Rich people, coastal vacation homes, unsolved homicides. Kind of predictable, but you read on./p>p>em>8. a hrefhttps://www.theguardian.com/books/2020/oct/02/the-devil-and-dark-water-by-stuart-turton-review>The Devil and the Dark Water/a>/em> by Stuart Turton. Needlessly complex at times, but super interesting if you like wooden ships and the supernatural. Couldn’t get through Turton’s other elaborate mystery, em>The 7.5 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle/em>, because I’m too basic./p>p>9. Theo Cray and Jessica Blackwood and Underwater Investigation novels by a hrefhttps://andrewmayne.com>Andrew Mayne/a>. I think Mayne was the first author I binged via Kindle Unlimited. Mayne is an honest-to-god magician who dives with sharks and writes all these books about serial killers just so he can give every antihero a happy ending./p>p>10. The Dublin Trilogy (actually four novels) by a hrefhttps://whitehairedirishman.com>Caimh McDonnell/a>. These “darkly comic crime thrillers” are just fun. Sharp writing and lovable, over-the-top characters./p>p>em>11. The Silent Patient/em> by a hrefhttps://celadonbooks.com/novel-inspiration-alex-michaelides-author-of-the-silent-patient-on-writing-the-perfect-thriller/>Alex Michaelides/a>/p>p>em>12. The Trap/em> by a hrefhttps://www.fantasticfiction.com/r/melanie-raabe/>Melanie Raabe/a>/p>p>em>13. The Magpies/em> by a hrefhttps://www.markedwardsauthor.com/books/the-magpies/>Mark Edwards/a>/p>p>em>14. a hrefhttps://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250268822>Every Last Fear/a>/em> by Alex Finlay/p>p>em>15. a hrefhttps://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250117441>Proving Ground/a>/em> by Peter Blauner/p>p>em>16. a hrefhttps://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/603508/the-red-lotus-by-chris-bohjalian/>The Red Lotus/a>/em> by Peter Bohjalian/p>p>em>17. a hrefhttps://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/211944/the-boy-in-the-suitcase-by-lene-kaaberbol-agnete-friis/>The Boy in the Suitcase/a>/em> by Lene Kaaberbol and Agnete Friis/p>p>I’ve also read a lot of mysteries that were meh. I could put them in a listicle as well, but I’m trying to offer quality content today./p>h4>Meh Things I’ve Read and Said During the Pandemic/h4>p>is a headline that would be followed by a billion boring things. Like for instance I’m between mystery books right now so I just read an entire bathing suit catalog marketed to women who have birthed children. In the catalog photos the sea breeze catches the hems of the models’ tie-dyed sarongs and maxi dresses and their bikini tops peek out flirtatiously from under their ombre macrame crossbody blouses and their strappy sandals sink into the wet sand and the ocean sparkles behind them and I’m just flipping the pages thinking, “It’s only a matter of time before your naked bodies are found creatively arranged in dumpsters and only a psychologically damaged FBI profiler with a secret past can figure out why.”/p>p> /p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/05/03/a-tall-stack-of-pandemic-page-turners-repurposed-as-beach-reads/#comments>b>1/b> Reply/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4282 --> article idpost-4263 classpost-4263 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/28/it-shouldnt-be-this-hard-to-get-people-to-pay-me-money-so-i-can-buy-stuff/ titlePermalink to It shouldn’t be this hard to get people to pay me money so I can buy stuff relbookmark>It shouldn’t be this hard to get people to pay me money so I can buy stuff/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/28/it-shouldnt-be-this-hard-to-get-people-to-pay-me-money-so-i-can-buy-stuff/ title10:57 am relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2021-04-28T10:57:52+00:00 pubdate>April 28, 2021/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/28/it-shouldnt-be-this-hard-to-get-people-to-pay-me-money-so-i-can-buy-stuff/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>When my daughter finally returned to preschool last week, her teacher asked her to tell the class about her family. She said, “My dada works at a a hrefhttps://www.knifecenter.com>knife company/a> and my mom likes to shop.” Thank you, Pandemic Year, for blessing me with the opportunity to show my impressionable young daughter all that a woman is capable of being./p>p>I do, in fact, buy a lot of stuff. It’s mostly food and medicine, with some frequency. I don’t collect records. I don’t care for expensive electronics. Coffee is good, bought in bulk when on sale. If I get a fungus on one of my more prominent toes, I will splurge on some generic ointment from CVS. And that’s about it except for my Goodwill habit, which sees me buying used clothes and storybooks every other week for my daughter. But I didn’t set foot in a Goodwill until I was vaccinated. Then I went nuts, spending $5 on one visit, $3 on another, always rounding up to help “fund job training” even though we all have our suspicions. Our house contains a lot of old plastic toys with the price stickers still on them, which will save Goodwill employees time when I disappear the toys back to the donation center while my daughter is at preschool./p>p>Right now I’m shopping for a job. I’ve had a few interviews and they all go the same way. 1) I put on lipstick. 2) I babble into my computer for 30 minutes with the expectation that the hiring manager or VP or whoever will find me so charming and human and real that they’ll hire me on the spot. 3) I don’t get hired. 4) I remember that I am now 40, devoid of youthful charm, and I didn’t go to personal branding college, and being a human is not actually a qualification. It’s like, the lowest bar. Lower than a machine. Lower than a fungus. But you also risk “underselling” yourself if you begin an interview confessing that you are lower than a fungus./p>p>And yet you only have to get hired em>one/em> time, by em>one/em> company, and then you’re suddenly Employable and Professional again and people like your 4-year-old daughter can respect you. I imagine it’s a transformative experience. Probably really good for one’s self-esteem./p>p>Interview Tips/p>ol>li>Don’t say the first thing that pops into your head. You are not blogging./li>li>Don’t lead with your greatest weakness, like that you have a Goodwill shopping addiction, or that you’re a loser./li>li>You can try to be funny for precisely 28 seconds, then you need to talk about your marketing experience./li>li>Stop taking nervous sips of iced coffee from your Yeti thermos because they’ll assume there’s vodka in it and come to think of it you’re acting drunk./li>li>Don’t cling to your daughter when you pick her up from school as if your entire identity depends on her./li>li>Don’t lose career momentum during a once-in-a-century pandemic./li>/ol> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/28/it-shouldnt-be-this-hard-to-get-people-to-pay-me-money-so-i-can-buy-stuff/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4263 --> article idpost-4258 classpost-4258 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-self-promotion> header classentry-header> h1 classentry-title>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/23/meming-the-neighbors/ titlePermalink to Meming the neighbors relbookmark>Meming the neighbors/a>/h1> div classentry-meta> span classsep>Posted on /span>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/23/meming-the-neighbors/ title11:51 am relbookmark>time classentry-date datetime2021-04-23T11:51:49+00:00 pubdate>April 23, 2021/time>/a>span classby-author> span classsep> by /span> span classauthor vcard>a classurl fn n hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/author/wistar/ titleView all posts by Wistar relauthor>Wistar/a>/span>/span> /div>!-- .entry-meta --> div classcomments-link> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/23/meming-the-neighbors/#respond>span classleave-reply>Reply/span>/a> /div> /header>!-- .entry-header --> div classentry-content> p>Our new neighborhood has a micro-kinder-culture that celebrates decorative crocs, hoverboards, and worms. Small posses of children migrate from house to house, rolling as if weightless on their electric craft, stomping across lawns in their spangled rubber shoes, overturning every brick and paving stone in their neighbors’ backyards, yelling “Jackpot!” when they find a particularly long and/or swollen earthworm, then triumphantly absconding with the squirming creatures in their soiled hands./p>p>Where do the children go when they leave us? I couldn’t say. I have not been to their homes. I have not stolen worms from their yards. It’s just not a thing where I’m from. As a progressive woman of middle age, I try to tolerate the foreign neighborhood kinder-culture, but I also find myself feeling threatened in the midst of this constant earthworm transport. Especially because we are still fighting a pandemic that was probably started at a wet market. I don’t know what these kids are doing with these live worms, if they’re selling them to restaurants or what, but I feel that it’s only a matter of time before a disease jumps from worm to kid, or god forbid from kid to worm. Then what?/p>p>That is a rhetorical question. We all know what will happen. Little worm hospitals. Tanks of oxygen the length of their slimy, unfurled bodies./p>p>By the way, my mom told me recently that when she was little she ate a roly-poly on a dare and she is like a different person to me now./p> /div>!-- .entry-content --> footer classentry-meta> span classcat-links> span classentry-utility-prep entry-utility-prep-cat-links>Posted in/span> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/category/self-promotion/ relcategory tag>more bullshit/a> /span> span classsep> | /span> span classcomments-link>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2021/04/23/meming-the-neighbors/#respond>span classleave-reply>Leave a reply/span>/a>/span> /footer>!-- #entry-meta --> /article>!-- #post-4258 --> nav idnav-below> h3 classassistive-text>Post navigation/h3> div classnav-previous>a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/page/2/ >span classmeta-nav>←/span> Older posts/a>/div> div classnav-next>/div> /nav>!-- #nav-above --> /div>!-- #content --> /div>!-- #primary --> div idsecondary classwidget-area rolecomplementary> aside idsearch-2 classwidget widget_search> form methodget idsearchform actionhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/> label fors classassistive-text>Search/label> input typetext classfield names ids placeholderSearch /> input typesubmit classsubmit namesubmit idsearchsubmit valueSearch /> /form>/aside> aside idrecent-posts-3 classwidget widget_recent_entries> h3 classwidget-title>Recent Posts/h3> ul> li> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/02/02/shooting-my-shot-in-the-congressional-slush-pile/>Shooting my shot in the congressional slush pile/a> /li> li> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/15/texting-with-my-daughter-who-just-got-an-apple-watch/>Texting with my daughter, who just got an Apple Watch/a> /li> li> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/12/sick-animals-in-winter/>Sick animals in winter/a> /li> li> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2025/01/02/double-rainbow/>Double rainbow/a> /li> li> a hrefhttps://www.onestarwatt.com/2024/12/28/festive-attire/>Festive attire/a> /li> /ul> /aside> aside idsimple-social-icons-2 classwidget simple-social-icons>ul classalignleft>li classsocial-facebook>a hrefhttps://www.facebook.com/wistar.murray >/a>/li>li classsocial-instagram>a hrefhttps://instagram.com/onestarwatt/ >/a>/li>li classsocial-linkedin>a hrefhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/wistar-murray-2b66a84/ >/a>/li>li classsocial-twitter>a hrefhttps://twitter.com/onestarwatt >/a>/li>/ul>/aside> /div>!-- #secondary .widget-area --> /div>!-- #main --> footer idcolophon rolecontentinfo> div idsite-generator> a hrefhttp://wordpress.org/ titleSemantic Personal Publishing Platform relgenerator>Proudly powered by WordPress/a> /div> /footer>!-- #colophon -->/div>!-- #page --> div styledisplay:none> /div>script typetext/javascript>/* !CDATA */var sb_instagram_js_options {sb_instagram_at:304530049.97584da.8826a98b8cca420f8717a9546bf3452a};/* > *//script>script typetext/javascript srchttps://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/plugins/instagram-feed/js/sb-instagram.js?ver1.3.11>/script>script typetext/javascript srchttps://s0.wp.com/wp-content/js/devicepx-jetpack.js?ver202513>/script>script typetext/javascript srchttps://secure.gravatar.com/js/gprofiles.js?ver2025Maraa>/script>script typetext/javascript>/* !CDATA */var WPGroHo {my_hash:};/* > *//script>script typetext/javascript srchttps://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/plugins/jetpack/modules/wpgroho.js?ver4.7.29>/script>script typetext/javascript srchttps://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-content/plugins/easy-twitter-feed-widget/lib/js/widget-easy-twitter-feed-widget.js?ver1.0>/script>script typetext/javascript srchttps://www.onestarwatt.com/wp-includes/js/wp-embed.min.js?ver4.7.29>/script>script typetext/javascript srchttps://stats.wp.com/e-202513.js async defer>/script>script typetext/javascript> _stq window._stq || ; _stq.push( view, {v:ext,j:1:3.4.4,blog:78903691,post:0,tz:-5} ); _stq.push( clickTrackerInit, 78903691, 0 );/script>/body>/html>
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